At times, it seems there’s nothing we can agree on.
Whether you’re discussing a new product feature with your team or talking politics at the table during your family holiday dinner, tempers can flare and biting words can leave us frustrated and angry.
Public discourse is broken. We feel it everywhere.
In her 14-minute TED talk, Julia Dhar invites us to learn how to disagree productively, find common ground in our conversations, and transform the way we talk with each other.
One of the first things to do: find common ground. What is it that we can all agree on?
For example, the importance of safer communities provides a shared reality where we can start the conversation, rather than pontificate, says Dhar.
One of the hardest things we face is to separate ourselves from our ideas.
Could we be wrong?
Dhar explains that we need to debate ideas, rather than discuss identity.
Her recommendations:
- Stop talking and start listening
- Stop dismissing and start persuading
- Stop shutting down and start opening minds
I love how she shared the story of Mister Rogers speaking to the United States Congress in 1969 (seven-minute video).
The story is well-known in the United States.
Mister Rogers came to testify about the importance of children’s broadcasting to the Senate Subcommittee on Communications, after President Richard Nixon proposed a $20 million cut to public television’s annual operating budget.
Using his debate and persuasion skills, Mister Rogers was able to convince the head of the committee, Senator Pastore, to restore the funds.
I can only aspire to become as well-skilled in debate and persuasion as Mister Rogers!
Check out the 14-minute video of Dhar’s October 2018 TED@BCG talk:
Source: TED
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.
